The Inevitability of Greatness

The inevitability of greatness that hangs over the later stages of the World Cup can suffocate the football. The occasion can overpower the less reputable and younger teams, Columbia and France, so the high decorated and experience teams, Germany and Brazil, win without even playing well but predictably keeping calm under pressure. The first two quarter finals felt like a well rehearsed play fulfilling the narrative for all the teams but like spectacular free kicks you can still appreciate a well practiced routine, even if it does not unexpectedly deviate from the set text.

Match of A Sentence: Germany 1 France 0

Germany score an early goal to kick off an exciting end to end game or they just slowly play out the game as a one nil  victory in a cliched efficient style,  leaving the French team to contemplate next seasons hairdo. 

Match Of A Sentence: Brazil 2 Colombians 1

Brazil bully a goal out of the Colombians who spend the first half shell shocked, only for their late flourishes to be extinguished by a spectacular free kick from the resident clown.

Don't Give Up Being All things Vile..... Thomas Muller

Dear Thomas,
Before you win the World Cup in the smuggest way possible and pick up the golden boot for the second time can you please pause and remember to keep up the good work of being a feral weasel,  having the most unlikable of faces, being the embodiment of a poor winner, appearing as a German Ken doll, the most loathed man in football, an athlete that no one aspires to be and everyone's favorite hate figure. Please remember it would be a duller World Cup without you and all the hate we have for you. 

Yours Sincerely

Joachim Low 
On behalf of all Germans

Man Crush Neymar: RIP

Here lies a man I did not think I cared about  but only now he is gone do I realize that all my misplaced  energy in hating him was fueled by an unconscious love and desire. I should have seen past the notorious bad hair styles, the sly grin and the arrogant strutting. Neymar is a special player, for example only a few players can dress like the king of rock n roll and look so adorably innocent.

Elvis Has Left The Tournament

World Cup Value Predictor

If money ruled the world then football would be this boring...

Belgium VS Argentina 

Argentina is massive in size and provides the world with soya beans, wheat, corn and a little bit of oil in contrast to Belgium which is tiny and its biggest exports are oil, pharmaceuticals and bureaucracy. Turns out bureaucracy pays  better than food. Put in a simple economic equation.Take Belgium's GDP per capita of 43,426 US dollars + Argentina GDP per capita of  11,573.06 US dollars = Belgium 3 Argentina 1

Costa Rica VS Netherlands

Lets not waste time with speculation, economics is just pure Maths! Take Netherlands superior GDP per capita of 43,426 US dollars + Costa Rica's inferior GDP per capita  of 9386.30 US dollars = Netherlands 4 Costa Rica 0

Forget that Costa Rica are one of the most environmentally friendly counties in the world and have the highest life expectancy rate in Latin America because really they haven't got any money to show for it.

So we have had Neymar's shock injury, vital to any third act World Cup narrative and now its time for an unlikely player to save the tournament, as unlikely as Lionel Messi.