The Shortest World Cup Preview Ever, For The Uninterested Armchair Supporter. Part One: Group A and Group B

So much is being written about the World Cup; so much online content posted (be it trivial or archival) and with so much speculative tactical analysis, it’s hard to inform opinion or have one of your own.

What if you could just describe an entire team in just one word and shout it at the TV set. I don’t mean chanting “En-gurr-lund” or whatever name of your native land is, but shouting something surprising.

What if this one word summed up everything you needed to know about the country and brought you a mythical form of insight.

What if the footy illiterates, emasculated, David Mitchell types could sit next to Roy Keane, Grahame Souness and other footballing hard-men of this world without fear of persecution, all thanks to one word.

Puzzled girlfriends, infantile children and Oxbridge types…

I give you…

The Shortest World Cup Preview Ever, for The Uninterested Armchair supporter.

Every team in one word.

Call me UKIP! But I think summing up a complete football squad and its population in just one word makes things easier and has marketing potential.

Group A

Brazil are…Prime

prime

adjective 1. of the first importance; demanding the fullest consideration: a prime requisite for a Nike Advert.2.of the greatest relevance or significance: a prime example, Pele. 4. of the greatest commercial value: prime building lots (i.e. favelas).

Croatia are… Concise

concise

adjective expressing or covering much in few words; brief in form but comprehensive in scope;     succinct; terse: Croatia are a concise example of football's worse 90s haircuts.




  "cause he's worth it,"

Cameroon are…Persist

persist

verb (used without object)1.to continue steadfastly or firmly in some state, purpose, course of action, or the like,    especially inspite of opposition, remonstrance, etc.: to persist despite training lack of training facilities, wages or performance bonuses; 2.to last or endure tenaciously: The legend of King Eto has persisted for nearly fifteen centuries.

Mexico are….. Custom

noun

1.a habitual practice; the usual way of acting in given circumstances i.e. always qualifying despite never being that good.

Group B

Spain are…Fastidious 

adjective1.excessively particular, critical, or demanding; hard to please: a fastidious commentator.

2.requiring or characterized by excessive care or delicacy; painstaking.

Netherlands are…Mondaine

adjective Characteristic of fashionable society; worldly

(from French: see mundane)

Chile are…. Propulsion

 noun

1.the act or process of propelling (towards goal). 2.the state of being propelled (from the defence).3. a means of propelling (leaving only Gary Medel).

Australia are….. Snarl

verb (used without object)

1.to growl threateningly or viciously, especially with a raised upper lip to bare the teeth, as a dog (think Walkabout on a Saturday night).

verb (used with object)

2.to say by snarling: to snarl a corner flag.